quotes on a theme…

There have been quotes that described my feelings in certain moments better than I could. And the words helped me to sit with myself for a while until things changed, and I could find new words.

For now I am a drowning man, on a crowded raft built for one. I must push everyone else off this raft, in order to survive myself; hoping desperately that they, who can swim so much better than I, will swim and not sink,…but knowing against love itself that if I do not slice them adrift I myself will surely die. And still seeing forever the expression on their faces – an expression of anguish, and rage, and betrayal – when I finally cut them free. – Levin

There is no longer a necessary reason for my being. Already the long shadows of untimely oblivion creep over me, and I shall decrease forever. – Emerson

This phantasm of falling petals vanishes into moon and flowers – Okyo

For how much longer can I howl into this wind. -Robert Smith, The Cure

Oh God, grant me mediocrity! – Mirabeau

I no longer know what I am, nor what I am doing. – Mozart

I didn’t feel awful; I realized I didn’t feel much of anything. I hadn’t for a long time. Perhaps I’d been like that all my life, just like some babies are born deaf or without a sense of touch; but if that was true I wouldn’t have noticed the absence. At some point my neck must have closed over, pond freezing or a wound, shutting me into my head; since then everything had been glancing off me, it was like being in a vase or the village where I could see them but not hear them because I couldn’t understand what was being said. Bottles distort for the observer to…to them watching I must have appeared grotesque. – Atwood

Pleasure and pain are side by side. But most of the brain is neutral; nerveless, like fat. I rehearsed emotions, naming them: joy, peace, guilt, release, love and hate, react, relate: what to feel was like what to wear, you watched the others and memorized it. But the only thing there was the fear that I was not alive. A negative, the difference between the shadow of a pin and what it’s like when you stick it in your arm. -Atwood

Maybe this is life from now on and everything will be like this: You will crawl through all the seconds, all the minutes, managing smiles to protect everyone else from the hole you know is waiting there for you, making promises that cannot be kept in a world of sick guts and frightened longing, until it will seem that there has never been anything inside of you but the failure. It will seem that you have never been capable of any motion at all except to rip into something and grab and cringe, dig your fingers in and hold fast to the pain, have never carried anything off with sureness, or elegance, or grace. -Levin

Quid me mihi detrahis? – Ovid (shout out to darkentries for finding the source)

…it was true, but the words were coming out of me like the mechanical words from a talking doll, the kind with the pull tape at the back. The whole speech was unwinding, everything in order, a spool. I would always be able to say what I just finished saying; I’ve tried and failed. I’m inoculated, exempt, classified as wounded. It wasn’t that I did not suffer, I was conscientious about that, that’s what qualified me. -Atwood


2 Responses to “quotes on a theme…”

  1. […] Quotes that are important to me: See here. […]

  2. the poem by okyo is my favorite poem
    it has been for years. something about it struck a cord with me, gave me chills. I’ve always loved it

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